Mindset matters in life. People with a positive resilient mindset are more adaptable to
changes in the world around them and have a higher chance of flourishing after a
setback.
Do you feel the pressure of always being ‘on guard’ in case things don’t go your way? If
so, this article will help you to adopt and maintain a resilient mindset when faced with
challenges, disruptive changes or problems that seem unsolvable.
How do I know if I have a resilient mindset?
Do you have a resilient mindset currently? One way to check is to ask yourself what you
would do if this happened to you:
It is your first time giving a presentation in a meeting, to a group of colleagues that you
don’t know very well. You prepared your slide deck and you have rehearsed what you’re
going to say. When your turn comes to present, you connect your laptop to the AV and
your screen is blank and even when you try to reboot, it stays blank. The laptop is
useless. Nobody can see your slides. What would you do in this situation?
A person low in resilience would fumble around and then apologise, asking to present to
the group later. A resilient person would see this as an opportunity to show everyone in
the meeting that they can handle tough situations with a smile. The resilient person
might crack a joke or two and give a shorter presentation covering the key points as
planned. If you think this is not something you could do, then you need to consider
increasing your resilience.
In any given situation you are responsible for your actions. If you responded to a
situation like a deer in the headlights and froze, you can change that, starting now.
After all, developing a resilient mindset is about developing your capacity so you can
move forward in tough times.
Changing your response in 3 steps:
- Make a list of things that happen to you where you have frozen or are likely to
freeze. - Acknowledge what you can control in each of those situations and how you can
handle them with grace. - For those that scare you, write down why they do and what steps you can take to
show your power instead.
Believe it or not, you have control over most things that happen to you daily. Every now
and again, there are those things that are out of your control. If you do not have a
resilient mindset, the things you cannot control could lead to significant setbacks.
7 Scientifically proven ways to build a resilient mindset
Researchers have found the top 6 ways that you can build a resilient mindset with
everyday activities, and you can start building your resilient mindset today.
1. Fit and flexible brain
Keep fit and flexible. While this is good for healthy aging, it’s also good for your body
and brain. Doing exercises that keep your brain strong and flexible supports a resilient
mindset. The brain needs its own type of flexibility. When you take care of your brain,
your resilience factor expands. Some ways you can do this include learning new skills,
doing creative activities or simply challenging yourself with brain puzzles.
2. Humour
Research shows that those with challenging jobs such as firefighters, the military, or the
police believe that there is one thing besides “telling yourself to be tough and get it
done” that works wonders. They use humour of any sort that they can to pick
themselves up and move on. This explains why sometimes, a person may hear dark
humour from those in a demanding role. It is one of their strategies to build resilience and
move forward.
3. Sports participation
Research shows that people who participate in sports that have a much higher chance
of developing a resilient mindset. As a result of participating in sport they come to
understand they will not always win, but doing and growing from the learning experience
keeps them going.
4. Face your fears
Brain researchers have found that the best way to overcome fear is to face it head-on. If
you have been fearful, you can help yourself by writing out your fears and ranking them
in terms of scariness on a scale of 1 to 10. Tackle the smallest fear first. When you have
overcome it, reward yourself for anchoring the feeling of overcoming a fear. Tell yourself
using this sentence, “I am (reward activity) because I overcame my fear of (naming the
fear).” For example, “I am drinking a glass of this smooth and expensive red wine
because I overcame my fear of asking for what I want at work.” As you conquer your
fears, your resilience muscle will be strengthened, and your resilient mindset will grow.
5. Moral code
To be resilient, you need to have a moral framework to help you make decisions.
Scientists have found that people who have honed their moral code overcome difficult
times better than those who do not. Those with good morals are compassionate with
themselves and others, which helps them get through difficult times and succeed in life.
6. Optimistic point of view
Those who hold a resilient mindset have a highly optimistic view of the world. Where
others see doom and gloom, resilient people see opportunity and potential. You may
need to work on being optimistic, and it can be developed. All negative thinking,
including being a pessimist, can be changed. You can monitor your internal self-talk and
reframe your thoughts from negative to positive.
7. Spiritual self
In this context, developing your spiritual self means connecting with the universe around you and all it has to offer. It means connecting with something bigger than yourself, some
liken this to purpose. It doesn’t mean that after years of not attending a religious service,
you need to start again, although for some it may mean that. Research shows that
joining groups of people who are spiritual and perhaps connecting deeply to the world
around them will benefit your capacity to build a more resilient mindset.
A resilient mindset is for everyone. Building a resilient mindset does not need to be an
onerous task but rather a way for you to continue to challenge yourself and learn from
your experiences. Even if you feel reasonably resilient now, now is the time to build it
when you have the energy and openness to do it. It will be much harder to build it when
you are going through a tough time. And your tough time will be harder to experience
without a resilient mindset especially as they can’t be planned for.
Think of resilience as a bike helmet. You don’t “plan to fall off your bike,” but you have
some protection from serious harm if you do.
If you would like to find out more about how to develop a resilient mindset, get in touch with me today and book a free discovery call.
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